How to write an obituary
An obituary is a small, public act of love — a way to say who someone was and how they'll be missed. This is the gentle four-step path we use inside Obituary Suite, plus specific guidance for writing about a father, a mother, a spouse, or a child.
1. Gather the facts
Start with the essentials: full name (and nickname), date and place of birth, date and place of death, immediate family — those who preceded them and those who survive — career or life's work, community or faith, and the details of the service. Ten quiet minutes with a notebook makes the writing itself much easier.
2. Choose a tone
Traditional obituaries lead with dates and family. Celebration-of-life obituaries lead with the person. Faith-based obituaries name the faith. Newspaper-style obituaries stay brief and factual. Pick the tone that feels most like them before you write a word — every choice after this becomes easier.
3. Add specific memories
The lines readers remember are never the adjectives — they're the details. "He kept butterscotch candies in his coat pocket." "She sent handwritten birthday cards, always a week early." Two or three moments like these turn a template into a tribute. Ask a sibling or a grandchild if you're stuck.
4. Read aloud, verify, and share
Read the draft aloud with a family member. Cut anything that doesn't sound like them; add anything you missed. Then double-check every name, date, and relationship — this is the one step no writer, human or AI, can do for you. Save one final copy for the family archive.
How to write an obituary for a father
Fathers are often remembered for what they built — a home, a career, a family, a quiet steadiness. Lead with the role only he played ("a devoted father of three," "a lifelong teacher") and follow with one specific memory that captures how he showed love: the Saturday-morning breakfasts, the drive to every game, the phone call every Sunday.
How to write an obituary for a mother
Mothers are often remembered for how they made people feel. Name her fully — first, maiden, married — and then give the reader a single scene: her kitchen, her garden, her laugh at the end of a long day. If she carried a faith or a community, mention it; if she carried a particular kindness, name that too.
How to write an obituary for a spouse
Writing about a spouse is the hardest kind of obituary. Give yourself permission to be brief. Name the years you had ("married for 42 years"), one thing they loved (a place, a song, a Sunday tradition), and the family they leave behind. It doesn't need to be long to be true.
How to write an obituary for a child
There is no formula that makes this easier. Say their full name. Say who loved them. Say one small, specific thing about who they were becoming — a favorite book, a stuffed animal, the way they laughed. Ask a close friend or family member to read it before you publish.
A short obituary template you can copy
[Full name], [age], of [city, state], passed away on [date] at [location]. Born on [date] in [place] to [parents], [first name] was known for [one specific quality or memory]. [He/She/They] is survived by [family members] and preceded in death by [family members]. A service will be held on [date] at [place]. In lieu of flowers, the family suggests donations to [charity].